Why do Relationships Fail? What is the Root Cause of Relationship Failure?
Well, Aloha and welcome back everybody. I’m so happy to be reconnecting with you this week for my newest podcast. We’re now moving into series number 4 and I’m very excited, it’s been a very successful launch of this podcast from three or four months ago. The first series was on Tao Healing for the physical health. The next series was Tao Healing for the emotional body and then we just finished the Tao Healing for mental imbalances that we can have, the mind-body mindsets, attitudes, ego attachments, negative thinking, and more. So, if you missed any of that make sure you subscribe, go back and listen to those they are loaded with powerful, powerful wisdom. I’m very excited to be revealing today’s podcast as we initiate series four because it’s going to be about Tao Healing for relationships and this is such an important topic.
Basically, we cannot move through life without have a relationship unless you are a monk on the top of a mountain that is vowed to silence and even then they’re going to have relationships with the other monks. So, we literally live in an ocean of relationships. We have relationships with our parents, our spouse, our children, our brothers and sisters, families, friends, co-workers, and so on. Relationships can impact us either positively or negatively and they can directly impact the entire environment of every day. If we have a relationship with a spouse, for example, and that particular morning that’s not a good communication that can affect the way we bring ourselves to our co-workers, to our peers, and for the boss we can talk inappropriately to those that work underneath and vice-versa. So, it’s really important that recognize the importance of (garbled) and that we look to how we can bring harmony to them. Now, some of you may know, some of you may not so I did put it in the chat that there is a entire course that I created on this. I worked on it for a long time, and I released it about a month and a half ago and it is called, “Heal Your Soul, Heal Your Relationships.”
And it goes so much further than Tao Healing, it incorporates my lifetime of knowledge and experience as well as all of the wisdom of the Tao Source Creator. It goes to a series of nine sections and each section sets a foundation to what is the root cause, which is what we’re going to talk about today, relationships and then once you can identify the root cause you can start the healing process. So, there is just gems of wisdom in that course and I recommend you consider getting it. And along with that, with the enrollment comes a month in my healing membership. So, I’ll let you discover, you can do your own homework on it, the link is in the chat.
What I’m going to do now is I’m going to share with you a little bit of that course. I’m going to play for you in just a few minutes here a ten-minute video so that you have a feeling for setting up for the root cause because that’s what, very often, is the core issue with anybody when they have issues or problems in a relationship. Simply put, we bring to any relationship a set of communication skills that we have learned and very often those communication skills are from the mind and not from the heart. When we witness our parents communicating in a less than loving, honoring, and respectful manner that’s because they’re coming from the mind, trying to express a pain that they are experiencing in their heart. Because the only reason that two people really get into fighting is because they’re hurt, they’re hurt emotionally and instead of responding from a space of feeling and needs, and oftentimes other people do by the way, the other person who is not skilled in the ability to hear that takes it personally.
So, I go into that explanation quite a bit more in this first video in my course. So, I want to thank all those that have joined me here today, great to see you here, thank you so much for coming and I want you to continue to return because every week when I talk about this I’m going to talk about healing relationship and I’m going to talk about healing relationship with family members, then healing relationship with co-workers and then we’ll go into healing relationship with spouses and partners, loved ones, soul mates. So, there will be a different facet of healing relationship every week in this series. It will have about six to eight episodes in this series. It’ll be amazing, you’ll get so much value out of it, for that, I’m absolutely sure.
So, let’s go ahead and share now this screen and I’m going to open a video here and then I want you to just pay attention to the wisdom:
Paul: Welcome to module one, the root cause of relationship pain. The first thing I want to start out with in this module is that everything you have done, tried up to this point to either find the ideal relationship or to fix one that you’re in, everything that you’ve ever learned is at the mind level. Relationships all operate on the heart level. The majority of people that will be watching this are females. It’s just the nature of my client base because the majority of females are heart-centered, they want to be able to have a heartfelt relationship and herein lies a great deal of the suffering that is experienced by anyone, male or female, that has difficulty in relationship. Typically, one more so than the other is very heart-centered meaning that they feel, they want the other person to experience that same feeling. The one that is most heart-centered tends to use forms of communication that are feeling oriented and the other person in the relationship, whether it has worked out, didn’t work out tends to be the one that is not so talented in the feeling and understanding the needs of the other.
So, when two people enter a relationship or one person wants to facilitate finding a relationship and it seems to have constant trouble finding the right person, the main reason why is because the hearts are not aligned. Therefore, the two people are left with heart to mind communication or mind to mind communication. Now, I’m telling you this right at the very beginning because virtually everything that you will find out there in the world of relationship and psychology of relationship, how to fix
relationships, how to heal in relationships, manifesting relationship, I can go on and on. Virtually everything does not speak to it the way I’m speaking to it now. You need to forget, at least suspend temporarily, all that you have learned about relationship. Because the vast majority of what you have learned is trying to resolve it at the mind level, trying to resolve it by the talking person-to-person level. Raise your hand if you’re one of those that are exhausted from trying to talk things out and when you say something that they don’t hear it the way you’re saying it, right? How many of you, it’s like hitting your head against the wall, you’re like, “No, I didn’t say that!” and they’re like, “Well, that’s what you said!” And you know no, I didn’t say that I said this. But they heard something entirely different, right?
I know that you know what I’m saying. So, in relationships verbal communication can be very, very detrimental to a healthy relationship but, unfortunately, this is what happens in society. We have, this is our form of communication and it can change things when you have different cultures because this culture might grow up a certain way and this culture might grow up a certain way and when you go to communicate verbally about it the way that verbalized communication occurs can affect things. The tone of how somebody speaks can affect things, right? There are so many variables involved that can negatively impact what starts out to be, maybe, a good relationship. So, it’s important to recognize that all of these factor’s culture, age, the ability to communicate with feelings and needs; the ability to hear properly what is being expressed verbally, all of these play into it. But, ultimately, what it boils down to, why it’s so difficult to maintain a good relationship and why it’s so difficult to find a good relationship, ultimately, it boils down to the souls, your soul and their soul, are not aligned at the level of the heart. Now, what is very interesting about this is, generally speaking, one of the two in the relationship, the one that’s most nourishing and nurturing oriented has that wisdom and understanding but they tend to spend the vast majority of their relationship, their life if you will, trying to find somebody who can align to that heart-centeredness and/or trying to find somebody who they can try to mold into understanding them. Either way, it can be like hitting your head against the wall because these kinds of things, heart to heart, soul to soul communication.
Mind to mind is what is taught, heart to heart, soul to soul is not what’s taught. We also have to keep in mind other variables such as what was the spouse’s or partner’s parents like. How did the parents show communication to each other, were they loving, were they kind, were they respectful, were they honoring or dishonoring? Was there abuse, alcoholism, or some other facet that impacted that person’s life? So, we as humans are frail. We come into this life experience as a soul that is incarnating into a body and we have these parents and we are subject to the parents’ communication flaws. Your mother, your father may have been awesome and congratulations if you had a wonderful mother and father, it makes for a much healthier child. Most of us do no have healthy mothers and fathers, one or the other is dysfunctional. And that dysfunction is absorbed by that child, you, that child, you are a soul before you were that child and your soul has lived a long, long, long, long time, lots of experiences and so I’m going to go into a lot more detail on one of the modules on this. But I want you to understand that your soul knew that you would come into this environment with one, possibly two dysfunctional parents and then they’re feeding you information and messaged and communications that, much of the time, is not ideal and heartfelt and loving.
And then you witness how they communicate with you and how they communicate with each other. And you probably as a child growing up witnessed where there was a lack of expression of heartfelt feeling and the lack of understanding of the needs of the other. You may have witnessed anger, reactions, responses. So, we grow up through that, come into our teenage and young adult years and realize the dysfunction of that and then go about trying to disassemble that dysfunction and/or make sure that doesn’t happen to us. Raise your hand if you’re one of those people where you did your best to try to make sure it doesn’t happen to you but it did, anyway. So, this is where we begin moving into these modules because if we can recognize that everything that we’ve ever learned, everything we have ever experienced up to this point has been purposeful and exceedingly valuable and it contributes to a future that we may not want if we are not paying attention to what we are putting our focus upon. Most of those that I’m talking to today are either in an unpleasant relationship or they’re trying to find a good and healthy relationship because they’ve had too many unpleasant ones. And this audience that I’m talking to, to you, you just want to stop the failure and just make sure it works right this time, not get your heart crushed all over again, right? That’s what we’re going to go into in other modules.
In order to have success in these other modules, in order for you to get the most out of this it’s important to let go and forgive, very, very important. Because regardless of how much you have been the victim of whatever they have said and done, regardless of your preconceived beliefs about your life, your worth, your value; their life, their worth, their value. All of that needs to go away in order for you to reset your entire frequency and vibration to make yourself the ideal relationship, to bring into your manifestation the ideal relationship you need to clean up the debris that’s in the field, your field. Your soul has a field and it carries with it all the positive and all the negative of all your relationships and it carries with it all the positive and all the negative your relationships in other lifetimes that came with you, like debris, in this lifetime. It’s all in your frequency and your vibration and it’s radiating into your future bringing forth your current manifestation. If you want to solve that, if you want to fix that you need to disassemble it and reconstruct it with everything positive that you’d like. That’s what we’re going to be covering in this course so put on your heart-hat, your heart-hat, get your pen and paper out, get ready to make notes and when we come into this next module we’re going to dive straight in. I look forward to serving you. We’ll see you in the next module.
Paul: In any case, what was shared in this is also the first in my series, there’s like 27 or 30 short videos, that was like a middle-range. There are one or two, they’re like 15 min but the rest of them are five or six minutes and there’s about 30 videos all together in this series that makes about three and a half hours, and this is in my relationship course, which the link is in the chat. And what I want to share with you is how important it is to understand that when we come into this life we come in with a lot of clutter. We come in with all the information our soul brings in and then we have to be subject to the upbringing of our parents which they may be awesome parents and they may be not so awesome parents. Like I said earlier, you might have one good one maybe one not so good and so the opportunity here today is to be able to recognize that if I’m going to bring healing to my relationships, I need to pause, put on hold everything I’ve understood to this point, take a look at which relationships have created a great deal of havoc in my world and then go through the steps which I’ll be discussing over the course of this series of unwinding those relationships for the main purpose of opening up our hearts.
We will also discuss realigning our values for relationship including and specifically how do we bring ourselves to a relationship in a healthy and balanced way versus a way that puts us in a very weak position, a position where we forego our own nature. Very often many people enter into relationship and they might be out of one for one or two years and they’re strong and they’re healthy and they’re ready for a relationship and then they get into one and then they basically put themselves on the side to make the other person happy and this is a recipe for failure. And I go into that and how you can make sure that never happens in the future.
So, a great deal of the root cause of suffering in relationships has to do with our inability to love, honor and respect ourselves. Another major facet is the traumas, the heart breaks, the loss of love, the breaking of vows, betrayal and so forth that can and often does occur in relationships, they also create a tremendous amount of blockage in our heart center. And these collectively contribute to a difficulty in both attracting a better quality relationship and holding on to a good one. If you’re already in a relationship, generally speaking, if you’re watching this or you’re interested in this course it’s because things haven’t worked out so well for you. Again, that would be because of everything that’s been described already in this audio/video. The previous information, the previous soul-level experiences that brought those people to you because, remember that every major person that’s ever entered your life, every person that has ever been there more than six months in your life, it’s highly likely that you and them have known each other before.
Which means that you and they have had relationship before. Maybe next week I’ll go into every soul has a relationship, we’ll talk more about that. Excuse me, every relationship has a soul, meaning that two people, there’s actually a soul of a relationship between you. That can be a subject all by itself. However, that is what has contributed to your current relationships whether they’re healthy or not healthy and a lot of people enter into what they hope to be a soulmate relationship or a love-for-life marriage, etc. and then things have gone south, things did not work out. This is also not too uncommon and so people wonder why, I thought this was for sure, my heart was very and then they did this to me and they did this to me. Why? Why did that happen? Not because of poor communication it’s because the hearts weren’t fully open. If they were they would have spoken properly and heard properly.
So, if you want to heal a current relationship, I suggest you continue to come to this series. If you want to find a good quality relationship, I suggest you continue to come to this series. If you want, if you’re in a good relationship and you want to make sure that it doesn’t go south for the winter then definitely pay attention to the wisdom that I’m sharing with you because there are probably more stories of good relationships gone bad than there are of people starting out in a bad relationship and staying in it, and there are reasons why. Once you are able to discern those reasons you can transform just about any relationship. And although this conversation is specifically talking in terms of a romantic relationship this wisdom is not limited to that. You can apply what I’m sharing with you to get a raise with your boss, or solve a co-worker issue or somebody that’s already out of your life a long time ago, ten, fifteen years, ex-spouse, whatever, but you still have anxiousness and irritation and grief around it or fear and apprehension about them finding you or being in your field or vibration, all that is equally addressed in the entirety of this series and my course.
So, to finish this live stream the same place I started, you are a soul having a physical experience. The purpose of your soul journey is to return to the love that you originated from, to experience life not in pain but to experience life in joy and to return to the love that you originated from. And since we are obligated to be in relationships and they surround us just like fish in the sea then we must be very conscious and present to how to bring our highest, the best, the most pure aligned heart in any relationship. We must look at those that we’ve had troubles with in the past and resolve those and I don’t mean going to that person and resolving it in person, that’s not required or necessary. It’s one of the most valuable aspects of soul healing, Tao Healing is that you can solve those trauma areas, those older relationships without ever getting in touch with that person again and you can do it by using the power of soul. When you do this it opens your heart, opens your vibration and your field, it causes you to attract to you that which you want versus more of what you’re not wanting because that is probably why a lot of you are here and that no longer needs to occur that way.
So, my hope to each of you watching here today and listening on the pod cast is that you follow through, check out the links, come to the futures in this series and purchase the course. Along with that comes a consultation which is a tremendous value, I’m not inexpensive, and that’s a gift for buying the course and you get a full 30 days in my daily healing membership. Those two alone are worth several hundred dollars, almost three hundred dollars those two along, and the course is half of that. So, you get all of that and the course, it’s a very good value.
So, I want to thank you all for coming today. I look forward to being with you here next week as we delve deeper on how to heal your soul, heal your relationships with Tao Healing. Grab a friend, bring them next week, keep an eye out for my posts. If you’re in my podcast, make sure you like and subscribe and share and I’ll see you all next week. Bye-bye everybody, have a great day!
